Another fall

When I wrote in my last post that I hoped I didn't fall off my bike, it must have been an (ignored) voice telling me not to go for a ride. I really thought a little ride would be fine, and it was for about 15 minutes...until I fell off my bike.

Rook and I were riding on a beautiful road with no shoulder, and I was going very slowly up a hill. I started wobbling and drifted out towards the center of the road. I saw a car coming and apparently got scared that I was too close to it. I fell down in the middle of the road, and my helmet grazed the car. I fell smack on the left side of my face, which is now red and swollen, complementing my new black eye.

Rook dragged me to the side of the road. An ambulance came pretty quickly; a paramedic put a collar on my neck and asked me to move my fingers and toes, which I could. The ambulance took me to Emerson Hospital in nearby Concord. It was the first time I got a siren.

At the hospital, I got my second CT Scan in two weeks and had x-rays taken of my shoulder and knee. Turns out I have a fractured collarbone. Rook said I'm in good company because many Tour de France riders get the same injury.

My knee is killing me. The ER doctor said the x-ray showed a small line that was probably there before, but he said to see an orthopedist to rule out another fracture. (I will be on the phone at 9 a.m.) In the meantime I am wearing a leg stabilizer, a velcro wrap that extends from my ankle to my thigh, so that I don't move my leg.

I also got stitches above my eyebrow, right near the spot where I needed surgical glue 10 days earlier.

My plan had been to have dinner with Rook and his wife, Annie, and then sleep at Diane's and go to the Cape Saturday. Instead, Diane drove me home, then Katie drove Diane back to Newton and then turned around and came back home.

My bike is at Rook's in quarantine.

I am bummed that I am going to miss tennis, embarrassed that I fell twice, and thankful that it wasn't worse.

With the help of oxycodone, I feel OK, but when it wears off I feel totally busted up.

The funny thing is that while trying to respect my limitations and keep within my rule of "one activity a day," I decided that because I was playing tennis Friday morning, I wouldn't take the proposed bike ride. But then tennis was canceled, and I threw the bike in the car.

In hindsight, which of course is 20-20, I shouldn't have gone for a bike ride.

I have been beating myself up, with help from other people who have chimed in with criticism about my lack of judgment: The tough-love approach, I guess. I think I should let it go now and just look at lessons learned: Don't run when it's very hot (from last week), stop when I'm tired, don't exercise quite so much and continue working to find a balance.

My cheerleaders pointed out that my tendency to push myself helped me get well and thrive, but, again, I need to know when to push and when to pull back.

I have lost some weight over the past month or so, and now is my chance to put some pounds back on, just taking it easy and eating the food that people have brought over.